It's Okay to Love them both
by tngtrekkie320
Summary: My take on what will happen when Season 3 begins.  The story begins the next morning and will follow Elena and Damon.
1. Chapter 1

The yellow sunlight streamed in underneath her slowly opening eyelids. She opened them all the way and stared out through the window. The curtains fluttered in the breeze. Elena wondered where Stefan was then remembered. Katherine had told her that Stephen had completely given himself to Klaus. And then she had kissed Damon. A feeling of guilt and pain began to seep its way throughout. Why did I do that? Pity. That was the simple answer to a small mistake. Without a doubt though she knew that Damon would be by to talk about it. She had felt bad about leaving after, but Alaric was there to help and Damon was asleep. She just couldn't be there anymore.

Elena didn't quite know what to do with herself. Klaus was off somewhere completely unstoppable, Stefan had let go, and Damon almost died. There was nothing she could do to help anyone. She sat down on the cold floor and felt a tear roll down her cheek. Jenna was dead. John was dead. Everyone around her just seemed to die. Maybe she was the issue. She stood up and realized that she was the one person that everything bad seemed to happen around. She was the one to blame for all the pain. Elena reached up to the top shelf of her closet and grabbed the dusty old purple backpack from the 7th grade. She looked around grabbed some photos, money, clothes and her car keys. She opened Jeremy's door and saw him sleeping, his ring securely on his finger. Elena closed his door than her own. She tip toed past the sleeping Alaric and walked out the front door, turned on her engine and started to drive.

Damon woke up in his bedroom. The pain that had racked his body for several days now was gone. He pulled up his shirtsleeve and saw the bite had disappeared, so had Elena. He knew why. Damon hoped that she would come by later in the day. He walked down the steps and realized no one was home and then remembered why. "Stefan" he thought, "what have you done?"

Elena pulled up to an old motel on the side of the freeway. She had been driving for eight hours and could barely keep her eyes open. Her feet felt heavy and she walked up to the front desk and asked for a single room. She presented her I.D. and found herself on the second floor overlooking the sleazy Mexican food joint across the street. A bar fight was happening outside and loud cheering was coming from within. She was too tired to care and without changing, fell onto the bed and closed her eyes.

Damon waited all day to see Elena walk through the front door and call out his name with that disapproving tone she always did. But she never appeared. Beginning to worry he called the Gilbert home and got Jeremy on the phone. He said he didn't know where she was and figured she may have gone out to clear her head somewhere. Damon knew that was acceptable under the circumstances, but he wanted to talk to her. Damon ran over to her house and let himself in to her room. He looked around and realized her most prized things were gone. He looked into her closet and saw the missing spot on the shelf he had always noted just in case. In a flash he jumped out the window and got back to the boarding house. He then grabbed his car keys and started to drive.

Damon drove the entire night, snacking on blood bags and listening to bad 70's music. He finally caught her sent at an old motel.


	2. Chapter 2

Her SUV was parked outside. He didn't bother asking the receptionist were she was and tracked her down himself. He knocked on the door of room 215. Elena opened the door.

Elena heard a knock on the door. She was hesitant to open it, but she didn't think that anyone could have tracked her down yet; maybe it was just the room service. She walked to the door with her bags still on the bed and opened it to see Damon's face. Damon smiled at her. Elena shut the door in his face.

Damon called through the door: "You know I can come in. This is public property."

Elena leaned against the door with all her might. She furiously thought about a way out, but realized there was none. She turned around and opened the door again. Damon barged right in.

"What the hell are you doing?" he demanded.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm leaving. There has been to much death because of me."

"You think you are the cause of all the pain and death?" Damon's face seemed to contort in pain at the thought of that.

"It's not you." Was all he had to say.

"While I am not going back."

"Like hell you aren't and don't think I can't make you regardless of the vervain."

Elena, not one to give up, ran towards to door. Damon blocked her way before she even had her hand on the handle.

"Stop fighting me." Damon looked tired and defeated, but Elena knew he wasn't going to let her walk out. She finally conceded. She checked out of the room and got back into her car. Damon got in and sat right next to her.

"What about you're car?"

"I'll run back her sometime and get it." Elena realized he had absolutely no intention of leaving her alone even though she had given up anyway. She then realized with a deeper sense of horror she had to spend almost the whole day in the car with Damon. He would, without a doubt, bring up the one thing that had been burning a whole in her heart the entire day. She turned on the ignition and began to blast her music as loud as possible. She turned on to the road that lead home and settled in for a very long ride.

One hour into the car ride, Damon was getting impatient. He thought she would bring it up. Guess not. Damon reached over a turned off the music.

When Elena heard the music go off she knew what he was going to say.


	3. Chapter 3

"Damon." She began

"Elena stop. I know your heart belongs to Stefan, you've said it to me often enough. I just want you to know that my heart belongs to you. I am a better man because of you, and I thank you for that, but I don't want you to feel guilty about what you did. You only kissed me because you thought I was dying." Damon stopped talking and looked into the side mirror. He was ashamed and tried to hide it from Elena. Elena looked over at him and all she was the back of his head. He didn't turn to look at her.

Elena reached out and touched his shoulder in attempt to make him look at her. He flinched away at her touch.

"Damon look at me"

Damon turned around and saw Elena's brown eyes full of worry and concern. He glanced away again.

"What I did... was not out of pity. I..."

"Please don't say it. You can't say it." His voice was full of pain.

"Let me. I do feel something for you Damon, I just don't know what." There she had said it. Now it was her turn to stare blankly at the empty road ahead. She refused to turn and look at his face. Damon stared straight ahead as well. He turned the music on again. No more words were spoken.

Elena glanced down at the clock illuminated on her dash. It read 11:00 PM. The blue illumination seemed to fill the car as the music still blared loudly, though it now seemed to have disappeared into white noise. Elena knew they were still hours away. She didn't want to stop though and pushed on.

The clock read 12:00 AM. Elena's eyes were starting to wander.

"We need to stop." Damon was the first one to speak.

"Where? There is nothing around."

"I don't care just pull over. You can catch a couple hours in the backseat. You can't keep going Elena and seeing that you won't let me drive we need to stop."

Elena weighed the options. Ride in the car with Damon driving recklessly or sleeping in the car with Damon for a couple of hours. Neither was attractive.

"Fine. We'll stop, but only for a couple of hours"

"Okay. I'm fine here, you can have the backseat."

She stopped the car and pulled into a quiet gas station. Elena climbed into the back. Her SUV was roomy enough. She pulled off her jacket and laid it over herself. Damon lowered the seat slightly and closed his eyes. Elena did the same.

Damon opened his eyes within five minutes of closing them. He turned quietly to look at the small, beautiful form of Elena sleeping. She had fallen asleep instantly despite the uncomfortable position she seemed to be in. All he wanted to do was lay next to her and hold her to make her more comfortable.

She shifted in her sleep.

"Damon" she muttered, then something else. Damon struggled to make it out, his curiosity was peaked. She muttered nothing else. Damon thought over the things she had said. It wasn't out of pity, that much she had said and she had admitted to feeling something. The old Damon would have already tried to kiss her again, but Elena wasn't somebody he wanted to play around with. Elena was real to him and represented that lost piece of humanity he had been struggling to get back.

Elena shivered in her sleep and curled into a small ball. The temperature in the car was falling fast. Damon took off his jacket as well and placed it over her sleeping form. He tried to catch some sleep himself.

Several hours later Elena awoke to see the sun just rising. She breathed in an unusual yet tantalizing smell. She looked down and realized it was Damon's jacket. It smelled just like him. She breathed in his scent and held it for a second. Then she scolded herself. Stefan was missing and had presumably returned to his former ripper self, while she was curled up in the back of a car breathing in the smell of her boyfriend's brother. She sat upright and awoke Damon. Damon opened his eyes.

"Thanks for the jacket"

"No problem"

Elena turned on the car and pulled out of the gas station. The music was blaring once more as they began the last few hours of the drive home. Elena prayed it would be uneventful and that Damon hadn't done any thinking last night. She couldn't answer any of his questions if she didn't know the answers either.


	4. Chapter 4

I apologize for making this chapter so long, but I really wanted to get to the next part of this story. The next chapter will most likely be the last. Thank you so much for reading!

The small green sign that read Mystic Fall's Population 10,000 finally came into view. It was around 8 Am when she passed the grill and then pulled into her driveway. Damon got out of the car and whipped around to open the door for Elena. Elena smiled softly at him and muttered a thanks. He shut the door and walked with her to her front door.

"You know you don't have to watch me. I won't try to leave again." Elena stared at the ground not wanting to look him in the eyes.

"Elena I know you won't leave again. I'm just making sure you are okay."

"I'm fine Damon, I really am."

"Okay, well I will come by tomorrow to see you again." Damon didn't wait for her to protest and vanished presumably to the boarding house.

Elena walked into her house exhausted. She walked upstairs knowing they only person there she had to check on was Jeremy. She looked in and saw him sleeping, his headphones curled around his neck. She lay down on her bed, kicked off her tall boots put her head down on the pillow and closed her eyes. She slept the whole day and woke up only to have dinner. No sleep had really taken it out of her and she went back to sleep. This time she dreamt. She kept seeing Damon's face and then it flip to Stefan's covered in blood. She didn't sleep as well and woke up feeling uneasy. She walked downstairs and Jeremy was eating breakfast. He said good morning, unaware of what had occurred in the last two days or so. The doorbell rang and Elena went to get it.

"Morning Elena." Damon's smirking face looked down at her.

"Hello Damon." Elena stepped aside to allow him to enter.

Jeremy saw Damon gave him a friendly wave, finished eating and left to go hang out with Bonnie leaving the house to Elena and Damon. Damon flopped down on her couch and stared at her with his ice blue eyes.

"Any more thoughts of leaving dear Elena?" His voice was dripping with sarcasm. Elena rolled her eyes at him.

"No." She sat down softly in the chair next to the couch.

"So why are you checking up on me? Is there any news on Stefan?" She asked almost not wanting to know.

"As a matter of fact, I got a call this morning from a friend who said he saw him roll through the bar he was at. That's why I stopped by."

"Well we need to go after him! We need to help him Damon!" Damon frowned.

"I was planning to. Alone." Damon said rather pointedly.

"There is no way you are doing this without me."

"Fine."

"Fine? That's it?"

"What were you expecting me to do? Go down kicking and screaming? I'm not going to argue with you on this one."

Elena mulled his words over in her head and wondered if it had anything to do with the most recent events that had transpired.

"Can you be ready to go in an hour?"

"Yeah, I just need to tell Jeremy and put some things together."

"I'll be back then to pick you up." Then Damon was gone.

Elena laughed. Damon had tried so hard to bring her home and now he was the one taking her away again.

An hour later Damon was back and Elena pilled into his car. Huh, she thought, he must have gone back to get it at some point. Elena had called Jeremy and let him know what was going on. Jeremy had long since matured and Elena knew he would okay by himself for however long she would be gone. Damon started the car and pulled out of the drive and soon they were on the highway. The music was on again. This seemed to be a new constant theme in their interactions. They drove for hours like that. Damon spoke up seeming to voice Elena's concern.

"When we find him and if he is not himself you are going to have to let him go. I knew Stefan when he was a Ripper Elena. It was bad and no one could teach him humanity until Lexie. But Lexie is gone, I killed her and you can't do it because he will kill you before you can even mutter a word. You are going to have to let him go" Damon looked at her. His eyes showed the true sympathy he felt for the situation Elena was in.

"I know that" Elena did know, but didn't think she would be able to do it.

They passed small town after small town. Damon finally pulled over to a small bar that rested just off the side of the road. Damon told Elena to wait in the car and he walked inside. Elena waited and saw the sun beginning to set on the horizon. Damon came back out to the car.

"According to my friend he left just under an hour ago in his car. He can't be far off."

Damon revved the engine and the pulled back onto the road.

An hour passed and all they saw was trees and open plains. About two hours later they came across a small bed and breakfast. Stefan's car was parked in the front. Damon pulled a u-turn and parked several hundred feet away on the side of the road. He turned to look at Elena. He could see the fear in her eyes.

"Please, for me, stay here." His voice pleaded with her.

Elena felt bad as she said that she would. As bad as she felt for lying to Damon her desire to see and help Stefan was far greater. As soon as Damon walked into the B&B she got out of the car and ran after him.

When Damon walked in he could smell the blood. His fangs came out on instinct alone.

"Stefan" he called out hesitantly. Stefan landed right in front of him having jumped from the landing area on the old staircase.

"Ah brother, come to join me?"

"No I'm here to take you home." Damon could see there was no way to reason with him. He was gone.

"I see you've brought a snack. My lovely Elena, how are you today." Stefan bowed deeply as he said this.

Damon whipped around pure fury filled his eyes, but a strong sadness was there as well. Elena couldn't tell if was for her and Stefan.

"Please Stefan it's me, Elena. I know this isn't you." Elena pleaded with him.

"Elena he is gone. The Stefan you know is gone." Damon softly said. "Go back to the car." This he demanded.

"No, no, no. Not so fast." Stefan jumped in front of the door and reached for Elena. Damon ran right into Stefan pushing them both through the wall and into the sunlight. Elena stood, rooted to the floor horrified at the scene taking place in front of her. Damon wrestled Stefan to the ground. Stefan pushed him off and they stood facing each other.

"I always knew, the moment you came back from Georgia with her, you began to love her. She had to be the one to bring back your humanity. I hated you for that. But now I don't care." Stefan smiled then ran at Damon. Elena crumpled to the floor. Damon jumped aside, he still had the tactful advantage. Stefan hadn't been on human blood long enough.

"You know what Damon," Stefan said realizing his defeat, "I'll leave you to her. Good bye Elena, I will always... hate you." At that Stefan ran.

Elena sat sobbing on the floor. Damon came over picked her up and held her walking back to the car. He laid her in the backseat and held as sobs of hatred, pain, and sorrow racked her broken body.


	5. Chapter 5

As Damon gently placed Elena on her bed, they had just arrived back in Mystic Falls, she grabbed on to him. At this point Damon seemed to be the only thing keeping her from going over the edge into nothing. Damon obliged thinking she had done the same for him just a little while ago. He lay there with her, holding her as the tears slowly stopped and she fell into sleep.

The sunlight was once again streaming through the window. Elena awoke and was startled by the feeling of another person next to her. She turned her head and saw Damon lying there. His eyes were closed and his breathing even. He was turned towards her in a protective way and that's when Elena realized that what she felt for him was not because she had felt bad as he was dying or was just attractive, it was because he cared so much for her and would die to save her and she had known it all along. She had never wanted to admit it. He wouldn't have given into Klaus because he loved her too much for that. That was something Stefan had failed in. The blood had become too much for him and his love wasn't strong enough. And if Elena was being honest with herself, she knew that his love would never be enough to make her truly happy. Damon was still sleeping and in a move that even surprised herself, she inched a little closer and woke him with a soft kiss. Damon opened his eyes in surprise.

"What are you doing?"

"Damon, you have always been there even when Stefan wasn't and I understand now that you are the one who will make me truly happy, not Stefan."

Damon for once in his life had absolutely nothing to say. He couldn't believe that Elena had finally admitted what he had known all along. Stefan would always hold her back, needing her to be a person that had to be protected and weak. So instead of saying something he leaned in to kiss her back. He stopped moments before their lips would meet and whispered: "Do you truly want me?"

Her lips crashing into his was answer enough.

They lie their for a while just holding each other. Elena felt bad that it had taken losing Stefan to finally realize how much she felt for Damon, but was nevertheless happy it had happened. She had never felt so free, so alive. It was like finding a whole new person. This was the Elena she wanted to be.

Elena's stomach grumbled, at the smell of Jeremy making his breakfast downstairs. Elena rolled out of bed and was surprised to see Damon now standing at the window, ready to leave.

"Why are you leaving?"

"I don't think Jeremy really wants to see me with you."

"Damon." She sighed realizing he didn't understand that she wanted to be with him forever and actually have a relationship. "I want to show Jeremy that we are together. Because that is what we are, together."

They walked hand in hand down the stairs and sat down for breakfast. Jeremy was sitting at the counter and choked on his food in surprise at the sight of Damon.

"What is he doing here?"

"Jeremy it's a long, long, story, but first can we just have some breakfast?"

Sorry for the slow last update! Thank you so much for reading and I really appreciate the reviews, so feel free to leave me a comment, good or bad. Hopefully I'll write another story soon!

Haha, I just changed Jenna to Jeremy sorry about that!


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